The thought has been simmering at the back of my head for a few weeks now. I need to blog it in order for it to crystallize and take shape.
To think is to create. (thank you PSI)
Since 2006, I already knew my calling: EVANGELIZATION. But that thought did not make much sense when I left Janssen and the BLD Singles Ministry to re-join Smart in 2007. My new job demanded so much of my time, it required excessive gray matter that I did not have time to pursue other things… and I was a workhorse that had to churn out one advertising campaign after another. At the end of my first year in Smart, I had done a whopping 197 ad campaigns.
Mid-2008, a man who had just turned 40 and was dear to me at that particular time was struggling with himself. He was experiencing mid-life crisis. He plainly expressed that at his age, he still did not know what his life purpose was. I gave him a curious look. So point-blank he asked me:
“Do you know what your purpose in life is?”
The answer to me was crystal clear. In a heartbeat, I replied,
“Yes. My purpose, my calling is to do evangelization.”
He was wide-eyed and doubly surprised. From how he knew me, plus with the hours I kept in the office, he couldn’t fathom what I meant. I gently explained to him how I had spent practically 16 years of life, prior to meeting him.
Quite indignantly, he retorted,
“Then why aren’t you evangelizing to me?”
I was dumbstruck. After a pregnant pause, I quietly replied,
“Because I don’t force these things unto others. I believe the longing should come from within themselves. I only aid, support and lead. I do not impose.”
Another thought was playing in my head. It was telling me, “Because I chose to do something else, and evangelization is something I have to set aside for now given other priorities in my life.”
Fast forward to 2010. This year has been a roller-coaster year, emotionally. But that’s not the highlight. An uncanny series of events has been unfurling before me, evolving, emerging, becoming increasingly more apparent. I can NO LONGER ignore my calling. I can no longer hide and procrastinate, pretending to be deaf and having other worldly concerns. No more lame excuses, no more but’s.
Don’t ask me about specifics yet. I just KNOW with real certainty this is a personal awakening, the start of something LIFE-CHANGING for me and my future readers/friends.
As I write this, it just dawned on me that I have received again the gift that I once thought I lost a long time ago: The gift of EXPECTANT FAITH.
This is what I have discerned: I will use my love of writing, plus my desire to pursue social media, as tools for evangelization (I wrote about it in an earlier post here). First I figured, “I need to create a brand new blog.” But tonight, it smacked me hard on the head. I didn’t need to create one. This blog, created in 2007, only recently seemed to have the most nebulous, generic positioning. Now, it makes real sense.
God is so good. All the time!